For the first time in my life I'm living in the country.
I look outside and a sea of corn meets my gaze. Cows wallow in the pond near the road, and horses flick flies away with their tails. Barns and silos dot the horizon, and the sunsets and stars are glorious. I love it.
Every day as I drive into town and back again, I cherish the time of transition. To have the opportunity to unwind after a long day, to think, to worship, or simply to roll the windows down and let the delicious breeze stroke my face. My heart swells as I drink in the simplicity of it all, feeling overwhelmed by grace. That I can be here, play a part in this community, and continue old friendships right where they left off. That I get to attend my same church, love the same people, yet still be pushed and challenged with a completely new life.
It's odd to think that just a few months ago I was living in the city: sirens, honking, taxis, and hundreds of people crossing my path every day. During long commutes in Budapest, I frequently had the same heart-swell, drinking in the complexity, the hustle and bustle, feeling overwhelmed by grace just the same: to be there, where I understood so much, loved so much. To attend my church I love, to worship in another language, yet Mine still the same, and to have a place where I was still pushed and challenged.
But my heart still longs for Home. A place where I will truly fit. And it's hard to realize that I am a traveler on this earth, no matter how long I stay someplace, and no matter how deep my roots go. I am blessed to find joy in the journey, to feel so fulfilled in such different places, and to feel so at peace with where I am as I try to keep an eternal perspective.
I am learning to embrace transitions, to celebrate the newness of change. I am thankful for dear friends and family who come alongside of me and challenge me upwards and onwards, making my transitions shorter and my life fuller.
Sunday, July 28, 2013
Monday, July 22, 2013
Growth.
Growth.
The word is full of expectancy, of hope, of the future. All that is to come.
I remember the thrill of planting little kidney beans in dark, rich soil. We watered them daily, and finally, one day the soil began to develop tiny, green sprouts. No longer did it look like I was watering the dark brown earth! No: I was watering a living, growing seedling.
Since as long as I can remember, I have been completely fascinated by growth: whether it was the pictures of a developing baby in its mother's womb, of tadpoles turning into frogs, or the process of growth in character, changes in understanding, and being transformed more into the likeness of Christ.
I am convinced that contributing to growth in the people around me is my purpose in life. In fact, everything I have been super passionate about has to do with growth, developing others, and pouring into them.
The more I ponder this, the more I realize that growth sums up everything that I desire.
As a Christ-follower I must continue to grow in the grace and knowledge of my Lord Jesus Christ so that I may become more like Him.
I am called to be a disciple-maker which is about helping others grow toward their Savior as well. I must teach, love, disciple, and train those who may be just starting out on this journey.
As a daughter I have strived to become more mature, more understanding, more obedient. I have tried to understand what biblical womanhood looks like, and what God calls me to as a woman.
As a student, I have chosen to grow academically as I gain more knowledge and skills, seeking to apply them across all areas, not just where I may excel.
As a musician, I have grown in my understanding of different styles of music, new techniques, and my endurance in practice... as well as ways to teach this to others.
As a student leader on a college campus, my life was devoted to seeking out teachable moments, to lead by example, and to encourage others to grow. In fact, I even held the position of Growth Group Leader. How appropriate.
As a Writing Lab Tutor, I sought to help my students grow in their understanding of the English language. As I did so, my own skills progressed, my patience was tested (yet lengthened), and my love of cultures was established).
As a student teacher I had the opportunity to share moments of growth with my students. With an emphasis on growth, there was less competition, and more celebration as students joined together to celebrate their progress, as well as the progress of their classmates.
Growth defines who I am. It defines what I live for. What I strive for.
But it isn't always easy. There are times that it seems like there is more decay than growth. Seeing brokenness, sickness, and hurt is exhausting and heart-breaking for someone who lives daily for growth.
However. It is in my pursuit for growth that I begin to see things in a new light. Even if growth is minimal, I find a way to draw it out in people. I want people to see how they are changing into better, wiser people, hopefully growing in their understanding of their God. I begin to become the optimist. Forever watering, rejoicing over every sign of change.
After discovering this passion of mine, my heart for education made so much more sense.
And it makes even more sense to approach this first year of teaching with a classroom theme of growth. Because after all, I am also just starting out. I will be growing right along with my fourth graders!
The word is full of expectancy, of hope, of the future. All that is to come.
I remember the thrill of planting little kidney beans in dark, rich soil. We watered them daily, and finally, one day the soil began to develop tiny, green sprouts. No longer did it look like I was watering the dark brown earth! No: I was watering a living, growing seedling.
Since as long as I can remember, I have been completely fascinated by growth: whether it was the pictures of a developing baby in its mother's womb, of tadpoles turning into frogs, or the process of growth in character, changes in understanding, and being transformed more into the likeness of Christ.
I am convinced that contributing to growth in the people around me is my purpose in life. In fact, everything I have been super passionate about has to do with growth, developing others, and pouring into them.
The more I ponder this, the more I realize that growth sums up everything that I desire.
As a Christ-follower I must continue to grow in the grace and knowledge of my Lord Jesus Christ so that I may become more like Him.
I am called to be a disciple-maker which is about helping others grow toward their Savior as well. I must teach, love, disciple, and train those who may be just starting out on this journey.
As a daughter I have strived to become more mature, more understanding, more obedient. I have tried to understand what biblical womanhood looks like, and what God calls me to as a woman.
As a student, I have chosen to grow academically as I gain more knowledge and skills, seeking to apply them across all areas, not just where I may excel.
As a musician, I have grown in my understanding of different styles of music, new techniques, and my endurance in practice... as well as ways to teach this to others.
As a student leader on a college campus, my life was devoted to seeking out teachable moments, to lead by example, and to encourage others to grow. In fact, I even held the position of Growth Group Leader. How appropriate.
As a Writing Lab Tutor, I sought to help my students grow in their understanding of the English language. As I did so, my own skills progressed, my patience was tested (yet lengthened), and my love of cultures was established).
As a student teacher I had the opportunity to share moments of growth with my students. With an emphasis on growth, there was less competition, and more celebration as students joined together to celebrate their progress, as well as the progress of their classmates.
Growth defines who I am. It defines what I live for. What I strive for.
But it isn't always easy. There are times that it seems like there is more decay than growth. Seeing brokenness, sickness, and hurt is exhausting and heart-breaking for someone who lives daily for growth.
However. It is in my pursuit for growth that I begin to see things in a new light. Even if growth is minimal, I find a way to draw it out in people. I want people to see how they are changing into better, wiser people, hopefully growing in their understanding of their God. I begin to become the optimist. Forever watering, rejoicing over every sign of change.
After discovering this passion of mine, my heart for education made so much more sense.
And it makes even more sense to approach this first year of teaching with a classroom theme of growth. Because after all, I am also just starting out. I will be growing right along with my fourth graders!
Friday, July 12, 2013
For a Season
There's a cutesy, artsy, hipster coffee shop in downtown Chelsea... a perfect stop for upbeat cyclists on an early Saturday morning, a late morning tradition for interested and politically-minded Chelseans, an afternoon indulgence for moms with toddlers, and a place to showcase local, acoustic bands in the evenings as the sunlight fades and the streetlights hum.
But for me? For me it's a place to reconnect... Outside sipping an ice coffee or perhaps a freshly squeezed orange juice as an occasional train rumbles by, or trucks roar past... pausing delightful conversation until we can clearly hear each other once again:
People that have weaved in and out of the tapestry of my life... coloring it, defining it, sometimes intertwining, then slowly slipping away again.
People who have had huge influences on my day-to-day life.
People I have lost contact with over the course of four years of college.
People who may never again have the same role as they once did, but who still open my mind to new thoughts as we talk about our lives NOW in the present.
This got me thinking about the fact that people often weave into my life for a season. That often they don't stay long, or as long as I wish they did. During that particular season they mean the world to me. They are my world. But as time passes and seasons change, their influence might lessen. It doesn't meant that they are no longer people I value. Rather, I value them more because they have defined a season of life.
I frequently feel responsible to stay in contact with anyone and everyone I once knew. It didn't take long to realize that is unrealistic. impossible. I began to wear out as I was constantly trying to keep everyone close. I assumed that if we were no longer close, it implied we had had a "falling out." But I have realized that it doesn't have to be that way. Relationships change. And that's okay.
As I transition to a new place, a new life, and a new world, a beautiful season comes to a close. My relationships will ebb and flow. Some strengthen. Some lessen. And that's okay.
I do, however, love a good catch-up... so you might just find me back in town, sitting at a familiar place, catching up with a familiar face.
But for me? For me it's a place to reconnect... Outside sipping an ice coffee or perhaps a freshly squeezed orange juice as an occasional train rumbles by, or trucks roar past... pausing delightful conversation until we can clearly hear each other once again:
People that have weaved in and out of the tapestry of my life... coloring it, defining it, sometimes intertwining, then slowly slipping away again.
People who have had huge influences on my day-to-day life.
People I have lost contact with over the course of four years of college.
People who may never again have the same role as they once did, but who still open my mind to new thoughts as we talk about our lives NOW in the present.
This got me thinking about the fact that people often weave into my life for a season. That often they don't stay long, or as long as I wish they did. During that particular season they mean the world to me. They are my world. But as time passes and seasons change, their influence might lessen. It doesn't meant that they are no longer people I value. Rather, I value them more because they have defined a season of life.
I frequently feel responsible to stay in contact with anyone and everyone I once knew. It didn't take long to realize that is unrealistic. impossible. I began to wear out as I was constantly trying to keep everyone close. I assumed that if we were no longer close, it implied we had had a "falling out." But I have realized that it doesn't have to be that way. Relationships change. And that's okay.
As I transition to a new place, a new life, and a new world, a beautiful season comes to a close. My relationships will ebb and flow. Some strengthen. Some lessen. And that's okay.
I do, however, love a good catch-up... so you might just find me back in town, sitting at a familiar place, catching up with a familiar face.
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